For my third post in the Social Media Series, I’m going to look toward the future use of these tools with regards to personal/family relationships. If you missed parts one and two (about the relationship and the separation), you can read them here and here.
So…the old relationship is over and the breakup madness has subsided. You’re ready to move on. Now what? If you’re still “friends” with your ex, do you want that person to know what you’re up to (ie: who you’re dating)? If you’re not “friends” with your ex, should you re-friend in the spirit of cooperative acquaintances? Should you and the ex tag each other in pictures of the kids? Should you share social “events” for the children? And how are you regarding your ex’s family and friends these days?
My recent breakup has caused me to think a whole lot about how I use my Facebook page. Shortly after everything fell apart I went into Silent Mode. I stopped posting updates and interacting with anyone in the public sphere. At this point, I’ve relaxed my standards slightly yet still keep my interaction regarding personal matters to a minimum. If I have something to say to a friend, I’ll do so offline, or at least off the wall. I’ve vowed not to disclose any dating/partnership info through that channel.
Personally, I think unfriending (and especially blocking) is unnecessary (like, overly dramatically statementally bitchy, unless there’s a restraining order). I maintain especially tight security settings for individuals who aren’t actually friends, and that’s enough for me. Recently, I unsubscribed from most of the individuals in my feed- my own drama (or lack thereof) is enough for me to deal with (or enjoy). My new newsfeed gives me a snapshot of updates from my real-life friends and the pages I most enjoy.
As for the blog… I think I said it once before: this space is different. Relative Evolutions isn’t about me, it’s about matters that are applicable to a community. In the interest of strengthening the community, illustrating relevant issues and supporting others who walk similar paths, I will continue to share personal stories here.
So… am I the only one who has taken a look in the social media mirror in the wake of a separation? What have you learned? What will you do differently? Are you and your ex playing nicely on social networks? Do the networks help/hurt your communication?