Quality Time

Boyfriend bought a chemistry set for Josh.  It’s really cool (kinda scary) and tonight we retrieved the lad and brought him over to do some experiments.  I tagged along for dinner and ice cream, but during sciencetime I busied myself with other chores and let them have their space.

When it comes to one-on-one activities, Josh and I usually find ourselves reading books while Drake and Boyfriend gracefully ride some kind of boards.  It was nice to see Josh and his dad spend some quality time together- just the two of them.  And even better:  it was educational and Josh was totally engaged.  Yay!

One-on-one time is difficult after a divorce.  I remember missing it when my own parents divorced- there were no more impromptu late night pancakes with my dad.  Instead, we had group breakfasts on Saturday mornings at the local diner (to which I usually wore my black sweatpants and my boyfriend’s football jersey… just remembering…). Con:  less time for Just Me And My Dad.  Pro:  The rare one-on-one moments were noticed- never taken for granted.

Other thoughts on this topic?  Parents of multiple children, do you encourage one-on-one time?  If so, how?  Adult children of divorce, do you have any memories to share?


4 comments on “Quality Time

  1. mandy says:

    I wonder if this is more of an issue for the non-primary custodial parent?

    My daughter and I just got back from a nine-day college campus visit trip – it’s certainly the longest time we’ve ever spent just she and I, and it was a good time. Now she’s off on another trip with her dad which means my son and I will get a week at home on our own too. Now you’ve got me thinking about how I make the most of that time with him.

    • I’m sure it’s more of an issue for the non-custodial parent. It also depends on the child. Boyfriend and Drake have spent a lot more one-on-one time together, not only skating and surfing, but also on rides to baseball games/practice. So far, it’s just worked out differently with each boy.

  2. I have three children and since they are so far apart in age, I definitely enjoy spending one on one time with each of them. I definitely encourage it when they are with their dad, but it is difficult to coordinate since he typically takes all three children at once when it’s his time with them. Much harder for impromptu 1:1 time with any of the kids.

    • Thanks for commenting! I think this is an area that can really make or break parent/child relationships after a separation. Especially for non-custodial parents, because there is always a period of re-connection following their time away from the kids.

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