The most evil thing I did to my cheating husband was leaving a note for him on the refrigerator when I moved out…
A few weeks- maybe a month before our Separation Discussion, Mr. Ex went out for dinner with a friend of his. He came home late to find me reading on the couch.
“So… um… you know Brandi Jackman*?” he asked me.
I looked up. Eight years earlier, Brandi Jackman was the high school sweetheart of a friend of mine. Well… she was, until he dumped her for me. She hadn’t taken the news too well and for about a year there was a lot of just-out-of-high-school drama that finally faded when she relocated with her new boyfriend and we were separated by a body of water.
“Yeah,” I told Mr. Ex. “How do you know her?”
“I met her tonight when I was out with Joe. She and her friend were waiting for a table the same time we were and we started talking at the bar. I told her where I was from… she asked if I knew you… I said you were my wife.”
“That’s funny!” I was laughing. “What did she say?”
“She gave me her phone number,” He said and tossed a scrap of paper to me.
I picked it up and read it.
Call me sometime: 555-1234
I found it rather hilarious as it appeared this chick was now making a move on my husband… payback? I used the piece of paper to mark my page before closing my book for the night.
…Fast forward to moving day. By this time, I knew about the Mistress. Truly, I felt free and happy to be leaving. I’d taken what was mine and left what was his and there was no destruction in the process. I gathered up one last armful of odds and ends and saw that slip of paper sticking out of the book I read the month before. In all honesty, it was his, wasn’t it? I couldn’t steal it from him…
He called me the next day. “What’s up with Brandi’s phone number on the fridge?” he sounded rather irritated.
“What?” I asked. “It’s yours. She gave it to you, so I left it for you.”
“Really?!? Because Mistress wasn’t too happy to find it.”
“Oh,” I said. “You told me you’d be coming home alone and sleeping on the couch. How was I supposed to know?”
But, of course, I did know…
(*Names have been changed to protect privacy)